she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize