:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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