I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Are these your boobs on my camera?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
