Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Having Father’s Day on Pride weekend is always so awkward. “Hey dad just calling to say I love you.” While I’m navigating my way through a pop up pool at a bar riding a penis floatie. Happy Father’s Day.
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