Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize