Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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