so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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