If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
