I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
The only reason I'm still around is so I can grow a huge Gandalf beard when my hair turns gray
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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