You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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