Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Why on earth are you answering my texts promptly? Thought for certain you'd be caught up in some ridiculous orgy by this time.
I'm that good.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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