"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
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