I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Randomize
