Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I need moral support for this bender
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
