Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize
