Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
The best revenge is premature balding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
I'm one shot of soco 100 away from fucking a mailbox
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
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