I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
