non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
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The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
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My boob is missing a layer of skin
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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