Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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