I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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