I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Randomize
