SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
