Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
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We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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