I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
