we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
