I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
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