Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
