Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
