In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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