My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
