Some broad at the bar just asked me how much money I make. I don't know whats worse, the question or the answer.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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