let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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