wat bout pragnant strippers??
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
