he looks like a really good dad on facebook
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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