Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
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