I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
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