Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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