So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
