I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
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