So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
I will be naked everywhere
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize
