i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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