Just brushed my teeth...forgot we used this toothbrush in bed last night.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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