is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Randomize
