Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I've gotten 23 condolence texts about Germany's defeat. I got 3 for our break-up. That's how much my friends don't like you.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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