i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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