Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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