I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Randomize