What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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