I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
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