watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
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Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
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So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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