Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
you had me at cake vodka
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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