fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Tripping over coffee tables hurts shins but face is okay bc I landed on a sofa.
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