Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Wake up. Pour coffee. Open blinds. Guy is skipping class and jacking off furiously to Asian porn. Close blinds. Finish coffee. So this must be what med school is like.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize